Admire

My friend Tiffany has opened up an amazing consignment shop, Admire. If you are in SLO county you must check it out! The shop is super cute and they have great consigned and new items. Check out Admire's blog.

~See the open invitation to their 'Preview Party' below~

Admire's Preview Party

Celebrate our opening with drinks, appetizers, and door prizes

Tuesday, August 3, 6:00 P.M

Admire, A Designer's Consign Boutique

8844 Morro Road

Atascadero, CA 93422

805-464-2404

 Have clothing you want to consign? Bring it in!

{clean, on hangers, and ready to sell}

Invite a friend and spread the word!

The Anti Nap

You know the days you really want them to nap? For me, those are the days they absolutely refuse. Little stinkers.

P.L.A.Y.

We live right down the street from an elementary school. And for some unknown reason I had never thought to take the kids to play on the playgrounds. I KNOW. Fenced area-vacant for the summer-right across the street. Our new personal playground.

Last Week in Photos

These photos look kind of funny. I love them to look older with a vintage look but I haven't had the time to learn any editing program so I just use Rollip. Which means, I basically just press a button and get what I get. But most of the time they look too old. Anyway, here's some of our week.

 

 

 

 

Maxwell's latest expression- especially funny when he gives me 'the look' then breaks out in a smile like he knows he's being silly.

Girl Time/Boy Time

The universe favors my stepson Michael. Seriously.  He's always doing something glamorous and fun. Take last night for instance. He won a contest through the Dodgers and he got to announce one of the innings at the Dodger/Giant game. He got amazing seats and invited Mike to join him. Little Meg and her boyfriend were also there. Mike took Maxwell and so became our first girl day/boy day. Ella and I spent the afternoon walking around Avila and SLO. It was so easy with one kid. She loved having my full attention and she acted especially silly yesterday. At home she wondered around looking for her brother, pointing to his crib and scrunching up her eyebrows, 'Where is he?' It was the first night that Maxwell and Ella had been apart. They did fine. Mike and Max will be home soon and as excited as I am to see Maxwell, I'm even more excited to watch the two babies see each other.

Beach Babies

Gorgeous beach day yesterday. If you're lucky, there might be some sand left on the beach- Ella ate the rest. I snapped these pictures as soon as we got there because I knew once they got in the water they wouldn't get out. Maxwell goes between our sand buckets and the water but Ella won't leave the water unless I literally drag her from the waves.

Daisy

I don't know Daisy personally, but I have followed her story through a friend who does. In May, Daisy's family shared this amazing video following their seven month journey with cancer. This video makes me weep, smile, and pray.


Daisy from Reality on Vimeo.

The cancer is now back. Daisy is recovering from surgery and I can't stop thinking about her. Pray for this family.

www.prayfordaisy.com

Thank You

Wow. Thank you so much for the encouraging comments on my last post. You know what's cool? I had the best day yesterday and woke up feeling great this morning. Sometimes it helps to just get it out there. Thanks for making me feel like I'm not alone.

I don't really know who reads this blog so I'm reluctant to share too much, but them I remember my writing is for me. I feel vulnerable right now and in ways my identity has been shaken. I love being a mother, but I miss being a wife. I miss being looked at as a woman, not just my kids' mother. I miss quiet times of reflection. I miss the effort I used to put into me. I miss validation in my career. I miss helping students. I miss feeling smart. I miss going to the bathroom without having someone cry outside the door. I miss little freedoms.  

I feel guilty for having these feelings. Like if I share these things people will think they bleed into how I feel about/treat my children. I feel like I have to qualify these thoughts: If you know me you know I adore my kids. I appreciate the gift of being a stay at home mom. I don't want another job. I don't want a new 'hobby.' I don't need to be taken out to lunch for distractions. I'm just learning this new role and how it affects all areas of my life, my marriage. Parts of it have come so natural, other parts are harder to adapt to.

There's really more to it but this isn't a diary. Life is just hard sometimes, you know? For me, if I stay in a place of hurt, areas of me will harden. I don't want my heart to harden. So today I chose to see the blessings in marriage and motherhood. I scoop up a baby in each arm and find healing, I let my heart soften.

This Week, Two Years Ago

Two years ago the week of July 7th changed my life. It was this week that I found out our egg harvest was successful and I got the phone call that six embryos survived! It is extremely emotional to really  think about what we went through during that summer. The week of July 7th we found out that the embryos had survived, but then we had to hope for a successful embryo transfer. Each day felt soooo long as we waited for the phone call. I can't find the words to explain the...anticipation, anxiety, hope, fear of disappointment. But then the final phone call came. I was pregnant. 'Really pregnant,' the nurse told me, indicating that my hormone levels were high and it was probably two babies. Each week after that I was afraid to believe. Afraid this amazing gift really was too good to be true. Until the weeks turned into months. And my belly swelled so big there was no denying it. And I could feel them move! I would be meeting with a student at school and I'd feel my belly flip flop and it was like a special secret between the babies and I.
Even though our experience was painful, IVF usually doesn't go as smooth as it did for us. I am so grateful for our miracle. We only had to undergo one IVF cycle and we were blessed with Maxwell and Ella. Today I look back two years ago and repeat my gratitude, thank you Lord for these beautiful children.

Halibut and Naps

Mike went fishing off his kayak this weekend and caught this amazing halibut and ling cod! Good job babe. And yay for yummy fish.

And also, why is it that my kids love to fall asleep with their Dad? I think it's cute and all, but I would LOVE to take a little snooze with them during nap time. But they never do. Unless it's with their Dad.

p.s. Mike does not have a side pony. That is the remote control on his shoulder.

Happy 4th, Happy 16 Months

Happy 4th of July and happy sixteen months Max and Ella, little firecrackers.

Circa 1967

Call me sentimental, but I think this is the cutest thing ever. This little outfit was Mike's, first worn in 1967. Then his son Michael wore it as a baby, 1987. Now Maxwell wears it.

 

 

 

The Barn

We spent yesterday afternoon at Avila Valley Barn with friends.

In a nut shell:
Ella pointed to every animal and and said, 'BA! BA!'
Maxwell rubbed his entire lunch onto his shirt, then went topless for the rest of the day
Ella tried to feed the animal food to the baby in the stroller next to us
Maxwell threw the lettuce at the cow and kept yelling at him
Max ran one way, Ella ran the other, and I briefly considered becoming one of those crazy Mom's who puts leashes on her kids
...We enjoyed a fun day with our friends. Thanks for sharing your wagon with us Landrie~

pretty in pink

I just received these pictures and can't believe how different Ella looks. A very sweet and creative local woman runs a 'girly' boutique out of etsy, but she's working on launching her own website. Ella helped  showcase some of her tutus and hair pieces. Unfortunately, Ella refused to keep the flower in her hair (you know, the three hairs she had at this time). These were taken in March, Ella had just turned one.

check out Jackeline's etsy shop, www.miabambinacouture.etsy.com

By the way, in the first picture I think Ella looks IDENTICAL to her big brother Michael.